Burying Dead Things

It has been way toooooooo long, since I have posted a blog.  Nonetheless, I'm back!!!  This blog is short, but powerful...well, at least it is to me :-).

 

 

Recently, I was requested to eulogize my friend's uncle.  The funeral services were held on a day that reminded of something painful in my life. While I was preparing for the service, I was fully aware of the pain that day represented, but I wasn't sure how I would respond. One reason for the uncertainty was because in the past, there was usually a gnawing in my gut as that date approached.  A second reason was because I was focused on writing a message that would bring some comfort to a grieving family. A third reason was because I was in a season where things were good, not perfect, but really good.  I felt in my spirit that I had crossed a spiritual plane that reinforced the saying "troubles don't last always."

 

It wasn't until after funeral service that I had time to reflect on this issue that was previously associated with a lot of pain. I was having a conversation with a friend and she inquired if I was sad because of what the day represented. I could honestly say no because I was focused on bringing healing to someone else.  I was focused on what was good in my life. Essentially, the lessons for me were/are 1.) sometimes our healing comes through addressing another person's pain and 2.) painful moments happen, but the good always has a way of outweighing the bad.  I had another "AHA" moment regarding that experience.  God spoke to my heart that not only was I eulogizing my friend's uncle, but that issue was also finally being put to rest. I hope and pray that your painful moments will also be laid to rest.

 

 

 

Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,

 

 

Veronica

Spirit Matters

I received a call from a young man who, at one time, professed an interest in dating me.  We went out on several dates and actually had a great time together. We spent some time getting to know one another, but the communication ceased and there were no more dates. He recently called to inquire why.  I told him the turning point was during a time I was having a crisis of faith moment and I asked him to pray with me.  You see, up until that point we would often discuss our lives, hopes, fears, goals and what we believed we were called to do. He would always say that he would pray for me and I would say that I would pray for him, which I did. However, when I asked him to pray “with” me, he hesitated and either wouldn’t or couldn’t. He said, he always prays for me and he would pray later.  I asked why couldn’t we pray then and the only thing that flowed were excuses.  I understand possibly feeling put on the spot, but this young man is a minister and he had previously told me about the times he has prayed with others. This was a major red flag that could not be ignored.

 

We can have all the physical attraction, mutual interests, amazing conversations and gut-busting laughter in the world, but I also require attention to matters of the spirit. Can I trust you with the essence of my being….my spirit? Can you help heal her should she become wounded?  Can you speak life to her, when life is waning? Can you help compel her to be her best? This should not have come as a surprise, as previously he asked me what I considered attractive. My answer was intelligence, confidence, sense of humor, passion about life and purpose and spiritually grounded. I believe we are spirit beings in human form and I need someone who is able to transcend the flesh and all other material substance/obstructions and speak to, reach, and nurture the essence of my being…my spirit. I don’t really need another person to pray for me. I can do that and I have a group of great friends who I know can and will fulfill that petition. I want to know can you/will you pray “with” me? Can we be open and vulnerable with each other in sacred places? Can our spirits commune and fellowship in a space where divinity encounters divinity and creates what is divine and sublime?  If not, then my spirit requires me to keep it moving until she meets one who possess the spirit who can and will attend to her.

 

 

Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,

 

 

Veronica

Becoming

Free to love unconditionally
In the face of possible rejection
Believing those ordained to be
Will enter in to divine connection
...............I am Becoming

Praying and seeking for love's recompense
Welcoming it's reward with open arms
Given freely, unashamedly with focused intent
To cover me, protect and keep me from harm
...............I am Becoming

Admiring the mirrors reflection of beautifully sculpted lips, hips and fingertips
Silhouette of thick thighs, ample bosom and bottom
Fully connected body, soul and spirit
Understanding the intertwining....erotic and exotic
Captivating movements with sensual mystery that's intrinsically hypnotic
................I am Becoming

She who is not afraid to speak of the horrors that cre-ate her story
Reclaiming self, found her voice and sense of agency
Declaring the oracles of God in awesome glory
Preaching, Teaching, Speaking...setting the captives free
...............I am Becoming

Preparing for the future, living in the present, embracing the past
Releasing perceptions not meant for me
Crafting a creating a legacy to last
Passionately pursuing the revelation until manifestation...Reclaiming Destiny
..................I am Becoming..............I AM




Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,

Veronica

...Once Was Blind but Now I see

As I write this blog, I know there is no need to be lengthy.  It is what it is....simple and right to the point.

Yesterday was a little difficult for me. There was so much on my mind and on top of it all, I wasn't feeling well. I knew I needed to pray. During prayer, God was showing me that the old cliché, "we can't see the forest for the trees" is so very true. I had two "AHA" moments.

1.) Sometimes we are so busy looking for "it" that we miss the blessings that are right in front of us.
2.) Sometimes we are so busy asking for "it" that we may miss the fact that "it" has been here the whole time.

We can be so busy looking for "it" to manifest in one form, that we can't see or miss out on what we already have. So, I guess all I really have to say today is let's not miss the beauty on the journey. Let's not miss or mess up the blessings we already have thinking we need something else.  Maybe what we want isn't what we really need. On your way to "it" appreciate the beauty of the forest and stop to smell the roses....maybe you will find out that you already have "it".


Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,



Veronica

Be All That You Can Be

So God made you a promise and it’s yet to be manifested, huh? You’ve prayed, fasted, been dedicated to your call, but it seems to tarry? The most difficult time for many of us is the “mean” time, the in between time…the time between when you embarked on the journey and when you finally reach the promise. Honestly, it takes little faith to hear the promise and even less to enjoy the promise. However, when we live in the space of no longer being who/what/where we were and not yet being who/what/where we are to be, it takes all the faith we can possibly muster. It is when we live in the space of “be-coming”, that we experience the true test of whether or not we believe the promises of God are yes and amen.  This is a lonely place, a frightening place, a vulnerable place, a risky place, a frustrating place…a place few would volunteer to exist. Nonetheless, it is a very necessary place.  This place reveals our true character and our resolve. This place makes us (creates an identity worthy of the promise), it breaks us (shatters the hype we believe about ourselves and reveals nasty/unbecoming habits, attitudes, actions), it constrains us (presses us like the olive used to produce the oil for anointing…it squeezes every dormant gift and ability to the surface) and restrains us (keeps us from people, places and things that would lead to our detriment and keep us from entering into the promise).

Beloved I wish I could tell you how long this phase would last, but I cannot.  However what I can say is that there is date of delivery associated with the promise. I have often wished that God’s time operated according to my desired timetable, but it does not. God’s time is accompanied by a process, a process that cannot be avoided or denied. What matters is our attitude while we are “be-coming”.  An attitude of gratitude along with a mind open to learning and spirit opening to growing will keep us and allow us to be all that we can be. With this attitude, the journey doesn't seem as long and I believe to God's delight doesn't take as long.

 See you in the Promised Land!!!

 

Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,

 

 

Veronica

Exposed and Clothed

One of my latest blogs dealt with my fear of vulnerability. I’m happy to say that I’m letting this process have its way with me and listening to all that my hopes, joys and fears have to say. A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with someone I gratefully and graciously now call friend. I voiced my thoughts/beliefs to him and he captured our verbal interaction with great literary and lyrical genius through poetry. He described our conversation as us being completely naked and yet fully clothed. What a beautiful space to dwell…completely naked (honest, sharing thoughts/words that leave one totally vulnerable to ridicule and rejection) and completely clothed (invited to share in safety and confidentiality and embraced with no fear of condemnation) at the same time.  This exchange has allowed me to go deeper into my hopes and fears and uncover and re-discover something amazing----ME!!!  Friend, I need to thank you for giving me that space, for sharing in this process and pushing me to give voice to my experiences.

My prayer is that we all find that person and place to help us reclaim our wonderfully created selves.  When that opportunity presents itself, I pray you have the courage to undress.

 

Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,

 

Veronica

Beautifully Scarred

Scar – mark left by the healing of injured tissue; mark or indentation resulting from damage or wear (Merriam Webster)

I’ve been thinking about healing quite a bit lately and gratefully experiencing it in amazing ways. Ironically, it was a recent injury that brought this to my attention. I was cooking dinner a few days ago and burned my arm. While tending to it, I had somewhat of an epiphany. I actually took a trip down memory lane as I examined my entire body and listened to my scars speak.

There are three scars in particular that speak volumes to my spirit:

1.)    A burn mark on the back of my leg (I accidentally backed into my father’s motorcycle and my leg brushed up against the exhaust pipe)

2.)    A iron burn on my arm (let’s just say this was due to an "incident" with my older sister)

3.)    A scar on my ankle (I was riding on the handlebar of my cousin’s bicycle after my father just told me not to and my foot got caught in the spokes)

These three incidents are examples of some of the ways we experience injury in life. The first is representative of life happening. There are things we may experience and there is no real rhyme or reason to it, no real answers for it. It's not anyone's fault in particular, sometimes accidents happen. The second is injury at the hands of another. What I’ve learned to realize and accept is that people can only love and give according to their experiences. Sometimes their own lives limit them and they cannot be or do what we would like. This does not diminish the injury, but it is sometimes the explanation for the injury.  However, God does have a way of sending others in our lives whose presence and gifts of love and grace overshadows the bad memories of those who hurt us. The third is a result of our own actions. When we know better, we should do better, but it is not always the case. There are times when the only person to blame for the pain we feel is the “man or woman in the mirror.” We received warning, had a feeling that perhaps we should not make a certain choice, but we did it anyway.

Each of these injuries brought about pain, tears and loud cries. These all happened when I was young and not afraid to cry.  These cries were all addressed by someone who came to my aid in time of need. We get older and are told that big girls don’t cry or that men don’t cry.  Nothing could be further from the truth. Tears are a necessary release of emotion and pain that can keep us stifled, stagnant and scornful. Cries are an alarm to those that love and care for us that something is wrong. Unfortunately, we are conditioned to believe that it’s best to keep our pain/fear/hurts from others. Unfortunately, we don’t let others see our scars.  We are afraid of judgment. Well, I now have another take on this issue. I believe my scars are a sign of triumph for they represent victory over pain and hurt. So as it is in the natural, so it is in the spirit realm. Some may look at my scars in disgust or pity, but I look at them and now smile. While the scars still remain, the pain no longer exists. I realize there is healing in the scabbing over. While it looks ugly to some, it appears to me as a beautiful sign of recovery. I pray you too can learn to rejoice and let your scars speak for themselves. There's a story of victory, if we listen closely and look through a different lens.

 

Abounding in Love and Growing in Grace,

 

Veronica